Recognizing How Emotions Influence Communication.
As a therapist, one of the first steps I take in each session is to inquire about the emotional landscape, both of the client and myself, in order to understand how the session might be influenced.
Why?
Because emotions act as powerful filters, influencing what we pay attention to, how we interpret it, and ultimately, how we respond. This crucial yet often hidden aspect of communication is what this article aims to explore. By understanding how emotions impact our listening abilities, we can strive to become more mindful and effective communicators.
Why Ask About Emotions?
While the question might seem as simple as "how are you feeling today?" it delves into a deeper understanding of the potential emotional filters that might influence the session. These filters can subtly shape how clients perceive my words and actions, and vice versa. By acknowledging the potential presence of these emotional filters, we can create a space for open and honest communication without as much emotional bias.
However, this exploration can sometimes be met with resistance, particularly from individuals who may feel uncomfortable openly discussing or acknowledging their emotions. It's important to address this head-on, emphasizing that emotions are not inherently negative or "touchy-feely." Instead, they are a fundamental part of the communication process, and understanding them empowers us to communicate more effectively and navigate communication with greater clarity and openness.
How Emotions Influence Communication.
Emotions influence everything from how we understand messages to how we respond to them. Some key aspects are:
Attention and Interpretation: Emotions influence what we pay attention to and how we interpret information. For instance, feeling anxious might make you hyper-sensitive to criticism, leading to misinterpretations of neutral statements. Conversely, feeling happy might make you overlook potential red flags in someone's words.
Speaker and Message Perception: Emotions can color our perception of the speaker and the message. If you're feeling angry with someone, you might be more likely to interpret their words in a negative light, even if they were intended neutrally.
Verbal and Nonverbal Communication: Emotions influence how we express ourselves verbally and nonverbally. When we're excited, our voice might be louder and higher-pitched, and our body language might be more animated. Conversely, feeling sad might make our speech slower and quieter, with our posture more withdrawn.
Word Choice and Clarity: Emotions influence the words we choose. We might use more assertive language when feeling angry or frustrated, and more empathetic language when feeling compassionate or supportive. Additionally, strong emotions can sometimes impact clarity and fluency, potentially making it difficult to articulate thoughts effectively.
How to Navigate the Emotional Landscape for Effective Communication.
By understanding the existence and influence of emotional filters, we can become more mindful listeners. Here are 3 steps to navigate the emotional landscape of a conversation:
Acknowledge your own emotions: Before engaging in a conversation, take a moment to identify and manage your own emotional state. Recognizing how your emotions might be impacting your perception can help you adjust your listening approach.
Practice attunement and active listening: Pay close attention to both the verbal and nonverbal cues of the speaker. Ask clarifying questions and paraphrase their message to ensure understanding. This active engagement demonstrates your attentiveness and helps you move beyond the surface level of the conversation.
Develop empathy: Try to understand their emotional state. This doesn't mean agreeing with them, but simply acknowledging their feelings and considering their point of view. By fostering empathy, you can bypass the filters and connect with the true meaning behind their words.
Overall, emotions are an integral part of communication, and understanding their role is crucial for effective interaction. By being aware of how your own emotions and the emotions of others are impacting communication, you can improve your ability to connect, build relationships, and navigate social situations more effectively.
MIRROR MOMENTS
1) Can I recall a recent situation where my emotions influenced how I interpreted someone's words or actions?
2) Have I ever unknowingly hindered communication due to my own emotional state? How might these emotions have impacted the other person's perception and response?
3) How effective am I at truly listening beyond the surface level of someone's words? Do I pay attention to both verbal and nonverbal cues to understand the full message?
Do emotions sometimes get the best of you in conversations? Individual therapy can help you understand how your emotions impact your communication and empower you to express yourself with clarity and confidence. Request a session.
